Happy Birthday Nancy!

My wife is turning a certain age on 2/25/2019. Like most of us who finally get to this "life event", I think she is a bit dumbfounded that this is really happening. How did we get to be 50? Wasn't it just yesterday, we were graduating high school with the world and future ahead of us? Wasn't it just last night we were leaving college and marrying, with the prospects for our life looking limitless? It sure seems like it, but the numbers find a way of catching up to us. We are ahead of the game, or so we believe, for decades. Then, as the Pink Floyd song goes "and then one day you find, ten years have got behind you". The future gives way to the past, but we adjust and move on. We move forward, but the years pile up behind us and we take stock in who we are. Hopefully we all find peace, understanding, patience, and a willingness to share our love more readily as we grow older. 50 isn't just an age, it's a milestone. A move from one phase of life to another and I have found there is no reason to fear it. There is still time to be who you want to be ,experience what you want to experience, and to learn what you have always wanted to know. 

This is a love letter to my wife and an expression of my love for her, as I take stock in who she is and what she means to me. 

Nancy, I hope on this most significant of birthdays, you don't feel old. I hope you feel in touch with who you are more than ever and realize the value of being present in the moment as much as possible. The now is all we really have, for the past is a memory and the future is a dream.

I love you very much. Through some ups and downs, we have stayed faithful to one another and have never had a serious discussion about bringing our friendship, partnership, and marriage to an end. It's just not who we are. There are times we probably haven't liked each other very much, but there has never been a time when I haven't loved you. I hope what I am writing is a better expression than the way I bear out my love in a practical way day to day. I know me and I know that I can be distant, judgmental, and surly, so knowing myself means that I know I am not the ideal husband. I apologize to you and our children for that, but never let there be a doubt that I am yours. Love seems to evolve over time. There is being "in love" and there is "loving". I prefer the latter. It's real. It lasts. There is something tangible about understanding and knowing another person and, despite that, remaining loyal to them. I know your secrets. You know mine. Nothing is left to hide and despite all of that, we stick with each other through the difficulties that life can and has thrown at us. 

Happy Birthday Nancy! For over 30 years I have loved you and been committed to you and I want to express that in writing, because I seldom seem to do a good job of it verbally. 

What do I think of you? Who are you to me? Why do I love you? I can think of a reason or two.....or 50.

You are as beautiful as ever.

Your smile is warm and genuine.

You care for the well being of others. 

You listen and you hear...most of the time. LOL! 

You give more than you take.

You allow me to be me.

You are committed to your friends.

You love your family.
You like Pink Floyd.

You are independent in action and thought.

You support your family.
You are the family doctor and psychiatrist when we need it.

You are the most compassionate person I know.
You love hugs.

You don't turn your back on anyone in need.
You trust me. 

You make the house our home.
You let me choose the music when I drive and most times when you do.

You gave me two wonderful daughters.
You understand chicken wings make me feel better when I'm down.

You care for and love our children beyond yourself.

You are dependable.
I never run out of razors. I'm assuming it's not the razor fairy keeping me stocked up.
You can be tough when needed.
You take care of the bills.
You never complained about that pitiful engagement ring.
You try to see the best in everyone.

You forgive my insanity. 

You are honest.
You love our kids in a way that I would describe as admirable.
You turned me on to "Lost". 

You work hard. 

You humor even my craziest ideas. 

When I need you, you are always there.

You are intelligent. 

You honor your commitments. 

You are strong.
You are tender.

You are warm. 

You are a fantastic mother. 

You are a great daughter, sister, aunt and daughter-in-law.
You encourage me when I need it.
When we saw The Jayhawks, you encouraged me to get closer to the stage.

You are welcoming and kind to strangers.
You are trustworthy.
You are a fantastic wife.
You are empathetic.
You are my best friend.
You share your love unconditionally.
You have made me a better person.

I am proud to be your husband and there isn't anyone that I would rather spend my life with. I love you absolutely and that will never change. Thanks for being my friend and my wife. You have been a blessing to my life and invaluable in my evolution as a person. My life is complete and meaningful because of the love you give me.

Thanks for being who you are and I love you from the deepest depths of my heart and soul. Happy Birthday Nancy, you are the best person I've ever known.

Freddy