Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band: Still Amazing

This may not be a post that anyone under the age of 40 cares about, and yes, I do take into consideration that anything I write is apt to not be cared about. I continue to write though. Enough has been written about the Beatles and Sgt. Pepper over the years and it would be silly of me to try to find some new angle to come from on it. I would like to say that I listened to it again last night and it still resonates with me, perhaps more than it has in the past. 

When we talk about this album, it must be within the context of its time. We are used to eclectic instruments and complicated engineering in our music. We are used to grand and colorful cover designs. We don't think anything of veiled sexual, social, and/or drug references in our modern music. We are used to seeing grown men with long hair that dare to walk off the beaten path. So, when considering the album now, it can't be given the same measure of respect it was given in the late 1960's, but those who understand context should be able to appreciate it or all its greatness.  

The album changed the perception of what a rock and roll album could be and what was acceptable to mainstream music listeners. It was an album made by music lovers for music lovers. It's no one trick pony. You get it all here. It runs the spectrum of music and each song is vastly different from the next, yet retains a familiar flow. 

The Beatles are among the most culturally significant figures of the past forty years. They had a great effect on how music is made and thought about. Their influence is felt all through rock music. They also impacted how we dress, wear our hair, and talk. They erupted in the mid-60's and art through music blew up with them and brought an entirely new way to be creative. The shackles were off and what a glorious time it was for music. 

Being able to understand the impact of that album helps me appreciate it all the more. Paul McCartney really shines on this album. His voice was at its best, his bass lines drive much of the music, and his songwriting was peaking. John Lennon was a major player on the album also, along with producer George Martin. Ringo Starr and George Harrison made their contributions ,but this album was truly a showcase for what "could be" from the creative genius of Lennon and McCartney. 

If you own it, perhaps it would be a good time to put the headphones on, stretch out and let the world outside go on without you for 40 or so minutes. Let the album wash over you and carry you without regards to what is the standard now. The world of music went from black and white to color when this album was released, sort of like Dorothy opening up the door after the tornado on the Wizard of Oz! 

We were talking-about the love that's gone so cold and the people, 

Who gain the world and lose their soul- 

They don't know-they can't see-are you one of them? 

When you've seen beyond yourself-then you may find, peace of mind, 

Is waiting there- 

And the time will come when you see

                                  we're all one, and life flows on within you and without you.

Within You, Without You (Harrison)

No Red Meat For A Month! Can I Do It?

I have decided that on January 15th, I will start an attempt to not eat a single morsel of red meat until at least February 15th. One month without red meat. That would be a first for me, at least since the time I had power over such decisions. At one time my cholesterol was a robust 370 and with medicine I got it down to the mid 200's. I have since stopped taking medication (it made me feel terrible) and I'm pretty sure my numbers are probably out of control. 

Since I do not currently have insurance to go have myself check out, I will start to deal with my health by curbing my diet away from the things that harm me most. 

If I pull this off, sweets will the next item on the agenda and then I may foray into the area of eating certain kinds of foods to try and develop a taste for them. I have been asked by a friend to document my thoughts on how I'm doing and feeling as this progresses. I will do so as the situation merits it. 

Wish me luck! It's all a part of "Keep Freddy Alive Until He's 50" campaign!

UPDATE #1 (1/17)
Well at midnight I'm three full days into it. I've not had an honest to goodness craving yet. Been eating chicken and fish. Maybe this won't be so hard?

UPDATE #2 (1/22)
So, maybe this is not going to be as hard as I thought. One week down with three to go and I don't miss red meat at all. No cravings at all for it. Substituted chicken on my pizza and that has worked out well. 

UPDATE #3 (1/28)
Nothing to report. I've not eaten any red meat or had any episodes of hysteria where I went ape shit and knocked down a couple of double quarter pounders....yet. I can say this. Two weeks in and the joint pain in my knees and shoulder have subsided. Not saying it's directly because of the no red meat pledge, but it's an interesting coincidence. I've had that stiffness and pain for several months and now it's gone. Hmmmm......

UPDATE #4 (2/7)
This has been about a boring ass self-imposed event. I'm truly glad that the joint pain in my shoulder and knee are gone, but this hasn't been much of a chore. I have 7 days left and I can't see those being a problem. I haven't had any craving. I haven't missed it really. The other night we were gonna get pizza and I thought it would be nice to get an all-meat artery clogger, but didn't want to blow what I had going on. So, I just got bread sticks. Trying to figure out what I may try to cut back on or out next. 

Johnny & The Monkey: A Tale From Louisville

I have a friend that I have known for about 30 years that I want to tell a story about. To protect this person, I'll call him Johnny. He's a good dude. He likes people and is generally a friendly person. Johnny likes to do some of the stuff I do. Watch sports, laugh with friends, eat, and get in a really good feeling zone sometimes. Johnny has a favorite beverage and to protect the beverage and "Johnny", we'll call the beverage "whiskey and coke". Although I'm pretty sure that Johnny doesn't enjoy the whiskey and coke as much as he used to, this story takes place at a time when he really loved his little beverage. 

I'm sitting at home on an autumn Friday night some years ago. At least ten years back (now that I think about it, it was at least 14 or 15 years back as neither of us had kids at the time), as I lived at my old address. High school football had the playoffs going on. How do I remember that? I'll tell you how. Johnny called me and told me he was bored at the football game (no shit, you're a 35 year old man at a high school football game) and to come get him. I was reluctant, knowing that getting Johnny early in the evening could mean that I too would be out looking for beverages, even though it wasn't what I had planned. I politely tell Johnny no and go back to whatever I was doing. Probably watching soft core porn or Father Knows Best.....I don't remember which. 

A couple of hours later, the phone rings again. Guess who? Yep, you're right kids, it's Johnny. He tells me that he is at a restaurant across from the stadium (we'll call that restaurant "King of Burgers" to protect the identity) with no ride home and I have to come get him. I know that he would do the same for me, (but not really since he left me stranded at work with no way home at least twice in our lifetimes) so I throw away the tissue and(....ah, yeah...OK, I remember now....soft core porn....that's what I was watching...)I get off the couch, get dressed and go pick up Johnny. 

I pull up to the Burger King, King of Burgers, expecting to have to go inside to get him, but Johnny, most graciously, was waiting outside to be picked up. Well, he wasn't REALLY waiting, it was more like wandering. He was trampling around in the landscape shrubbery in front of the Burg....King of Burgers and there were at least two police cruisers in the parking lot. Johnny looked a little like he wasn't completely sure where he was or what he should be doing. I pull up and ask Johnny what the hell he was doing and he walked over holding half a cheeseburger and half assed surprised to see me says "Hey.....Freddy....what's up!!!???" Really? What's up? Hell, he just called me to come get him. I lived in Okolona, did he think I was just crusing Burger Ki....shit....King of Burgers on a Friday night? (you know....he probably did, I wasn't much of a party dude, even when the wife and kids were out of town)

Johnny gets in the car. I don't remember what kind of car I had, so, we'll just call it "car". I maneuver around and get us on Preston Highway. Johnny has obviously abused his whiskey and coke privileges for the evening and will not shut the fuck up. Not even for a second. He's not annoying me (I love when he tells stories and babbles, he's good company in that way), he's hilariously just running on about this, that, and whatever else. Suddenly, he shuts up and stares across me and out my window as we come to a stop light at Preston and Outer Loop.......

"Freddy!! It's a monkey!!!!! Look, it's a monkey!!!!

 A gawdammed monkey!!!! Look!!!"

I, sensing that indeed, there may well be a monkey out my window, given the urgency in Johnny's voice, turned my head quickly. What I didn't see was a monkey. I saw a mini-van. I saw a woman in the drivers seat. I saw a little kid in the passenger seat looking back at us. I definitely didn't see a monkey. 

"Did you see it?!!!"

Nope. Didn't see it. I started laughing and said "Just how drunk are you?" I then answered myself internally, "At least drunk enough to mistake a child for a monkey on Preston Highway after 10 pm on a Friday night." Johnny gathered himself, but really did think he saw a monkey in that car. It didn't take a lot of convincing otherwise, but still....I had a grown man in the car with me who was seeing monkeys.

To make a short story long, I must tell you the conclusion of the story to properly top it off. All stories need a good ending and Johnny was gracious enough to give it to me. 

We go to my house, because he decides he is really tired and is going to fall asleep. I try to talk him into watching some TV with me because I wasn't tired. He insisted that he was going to fall asleep. I let him have the couch (ha ha) and went back to my room. Shut the door. Went to sleep.

BANG---BANG---BANG---BANG!!!!

"Freddy, wake up. It's Ga...(whoops).. Johnny! Wake up and watch some TV with me! Wake up! Come on gawdammit!"

It hadn't been an hour. The once sleepy giant had risen from a short autumn slumber and was ready for some TV. I, had not been tired, but was now firmly in dreamland, woke up. So, I got my ass up and we sat and watched television. 

And that is the tale of Johnny & The Monkey. Every word is true except for the parts I made up. 

Chicken Wings Are Bad Ass!

Alright, I confess.....I thought that the drumette section was a small chicken leg. That the wings I was eating included small chicken legs. Yeah, I probably shouldn't admit it, but it's not like anyone thinks I'm a genius anyhow. So, there you go. I didn't know that the drumette was not a leg attached to the wing. Sue me. You probably didn't know that dinosaurs used to be birds. So suck on that. No, wait.....dinosaurs and birds....no, birds used to be dinosaurs. I'm pretty sure that's true. I saw it in a movie or learned it in college. 

Back to the topic at hand though; chicken wings. Damn, chicken wings are really good. I'm not eating a chicken wing right now, I'm just kind of free thinking about wings and writing whatever flows into my head. Whoops.....got "Who's Next" on the turntable. Gotta go flip it. Look at this for a second....

Alright, I'm back. What did I miss? Oh, right. Chicken wings. Damn, chicken wings are really good. The meat is so tender and satisfying. I guess it's white meat, with some dark mixed in there, but hell, I don't care. I just know that chicken wings are really good. I'm a hot sauce guy though. Gotta have some hot sauce with the wings. Frank's or Louisiana are great, inexpensive hot sauces. They have kick, but a great flavor. I don't want hot for the sake of hot. I want it to taste good AND make me start to sweat like I was Lindsay Lohan's father getting a phone call from an UNKNOWN number. Hey, don't get me wrong here, buffalo sauce is good, but it just doesn't have the proper kick and it over powers the chicken. Yeah, I've thought about this quite a bit, why do you ask?  

I think I'll go have some chicken wings tonight with my friends. My friend Greg introduced me to chicken wings in college and I've been a fan ever since. Joey likes 'em too, but he's a lightweight. He'll stop after a satisfying 10 or so. He doesn't go to the "I'm never eating again!" stage. I'm not addicted though. As great as chicken wings are, they are not addicting. It hasn't been a gateway food either. You don't move on to harder foods just because you enjoy chicken wings. The chicken wing is good enough. 

No, don't give me any bullshit about "boneless" wings. Those are not boneless wings.....they are just chicken fingers with a different name. Just like our corporate culture, ain't it? Trying to make a sale off the back of someone else. Dragging the good name of the chicken wing through the batter like that! They made the horrible marketing decision by calling them chicken "fingers", don't take it out on the wing and try to steal their part of the market. Appalling and egregious! Get lost with that "boneless" wing. 

Well, that's it. I have hit the bottom of any sort of creative matter that I had in my head. Probably enough to fill a thimble and now it's gone. I'm reduced to writing about my delight for the flight apparatus of a non-flying bird as a source of nourishment. And a good day to you. 

If chicken wings are good enough for Axl, they're good enough for you!

New Year's Resolutions & Predictions 2013 Style!

Like most everyone else, I don't keep my New Year's resolutions. I'm not even one who really, in any formal way, makes many. Here I am though, writing while the rest of the world is sleeping, still passed out in a pool of stale beer, blood, vomit, and semen, waking up next to someone they don't even know, or puking their mixed drinks and 'lil smokies from the night before. I am going to  make a couple of resolutions and predictions for 2013 with no intention of working very hard to achieve the goals. 

RESOLUTIONS

* Lose 25 lbs

* Lose 5 lbs (at least this might happen accidentally)

* Stop worrying about what's gonna happen tomorrow

*Do 5 minutes of stand up at an open mic (this is now 3 years running)

*Deal with my fear of flying

PREDICTIONS

*I won't do any of my resolutions

*THIS dude that looks like an Asian Ricky Gervais will be long forgotten by 2014

*The world will end on 12/31/13, as the calendar on my wall runs out on that day.

*Abe Vigoda lives on!

*Joan Rivers continues to not realize she's been dead for six years.

*Miley Cyrus comes clean and admits she is also Hannah Montana.

*Hardee's will continue to be in business for some reason.

*Arrested Development returns, is hilarious, and nobody watches.

*I am going to be forced to board a plane for work reasons and it will crash.

*The last seconds of my life will be brutally horrible. 

*Nothing matters much from here now does it?